One

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Uhmm... Hello? So, I got this email, and here I am.
I don't know if I've missed a worldwide memo here or something, because I have no idea what this is. I mean, I get a lot of anonymous mail—you know, fan mail, proposals, and such—but this is creeping me out more than usual. I must have also missed some technological advancement, since I'm pretty sure printers had to be turned on before they spewed out papers.

Just to make things clear, I'm Nathaniel Gallagher, age 21, male model yes, contain your orgasms.
Again, if anyone could kindly explain the situation, I'd be very much entitled to rewarding someone with a nice dinner or a glass of wine.

Comments

[venusingucci.insanejournal.com]

Oh, goodness, my sweet boy, is it really you?

Ah, yes, the same welcome we all got. It's quite a lot to explain, dear boy.

Tell me you remember me. You have to. I'm your mother, for goodness' sake. Callista Lovelace, darling, editor-in-chief for Mode Moderne.

Meanwhile, you say you do modelling? I've been dying for new talent to promote my men's collection. Perhaps we could get together and discuss opportunities?

[roseredheart.insanejournal.com]

I know you!

Oh! Hi there. I'm Erato Amanda. I'm a Classics student at the University of Washington in Seattle.

I'm guessing you've realized you're... different from other people? If so, that's why you're here. Um. You might have heard what happened back in March? That was us.

[heraldofthedeep.insanejournal.com]

Well, well.

I hope you have more than just a pretty face to your assets, Mr. Gallagher. You've just entered a war zone.

[acratophorus.insanejournal.com]

A GLASS OF WINE, WELL DON'T MIND IF I DO

Welcome, I'm Dionysus Chaz. I'd explain, but I'm not good at explaining. All I can say is that there's high weirdness all up around here, and my advice to you is to have a lot of wine and go with the flow just like we used to.

[aegletes.insanejournal.com]

Oh, ho! I was wondering how long it'd take before you got here.

Dorian Cyrus--the Dorian Cyrus, naturally.

I wonder how much you remember, Squirt.

[inspiredvoice.insanejournal.com]

Everyone's being so careful. I wonder if you're fragile. Let's test it.

In order of appearance we have Aphrodite, Erato, Triton, Dionysus, Apollo and me, Melpomene. Welcome to the motherfucking fun house. Deal with your skewed reality now.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Is that so? Well, I'd appreciate if someone would start then.

It's wonderful to have stumbled upon such a lovely lady as you.
even if you're probably some crazy and delusional old hag when you're not on the internet
Haha, I'm always willing to share my talents. Though, a top-rated model such as I will have a fairly steep price.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Never underestimate a pretty face, boy. For all you know, this pretty face could be your demise.

So, warzone? Pray tell, which brand of crazy are you?

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

You. I'm already liking you. Raging alcoholics are just the best toys.
Tell you what, if things start to get too weird for my tastes over here, I'm gonna go have a glass of something expensive, get drunk, then obviously get laid. Feel free to join me.

[venusingucci.insanejournal.com]

It'll be a lot to take in, like I said. Especially since you're not showing any signs of recognition...

I tell you what. We meet somewhere, perhaps over coffee or dinner. I tell you what you need to know about this place, and in return, we see if you'll be a good fit for what I need to promote my designs.

[heraldofthedeep.insanejournal.com]

It takes far more than a pretty face to bring me down.

I'm guessing you haven't been paying attention to the news? The so-called Godling Threat? The one making the Christian Right apoplectic? You've just been recruited to our side. Congratulations.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Dorian Cyrus. Dorian Cyrus. Slightly rings a bell. Aren't you that guy who plays whatever the fuck instrument that is the guitar? I hear you have quite an appeal to little girls in pink. Good for you!

Waiting for me? I see... So, are you the one who brought me here? Which one of my fans are you? The one who sent me a g-string and a lock of his hair?

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Nononono. No. Things like that can't be real, right? It's just not possible. Right. Impossible.

Oh, did I just crash some cosplay convention forum here?
Do you guys wear togas and sandals when you meet-up too?
Melpomene, the muse is it? I see paintings of you guys going around naked. I wouldn't mind you coming over to cosplay for me, babe. That's pretty kinky.

[inspiredvoice.insanejournal.com]

Not much more than a pretty face then. Figures. That or you're totally in denial. Or maybe it's just both. I'd say "when you get with the program, let me know", but I really don't give a damn.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Hello to you too, lovely. Educated young women like you are always a delight and monsters in bed.

I've realized that a long time ago. Any other boy doesn't get where I am right now if he weren't special. Being the special little model that I am, I was off in Asia for a shoot last March.

[aegletes.insanejournal.com]

More than just a guitar, and more than just little girls, although my nieces and nephews certainly adore me. But thanks!

Sorry, mate, it wasn't me who brought you here. I had nothing to do with it--I'm as much a victim of circumstance as you are. There's something big behind all this. We're not entirely sure what just yet.

You really don't remember me? Pity.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Maybe you'll just need to see the rest of me then. At the very least, I'm sure I could bring you down to your knees.

Well, as I've told Amanda just now, I was out of the country. Godlings? Really? Ohshit. Well, I'm not much for religion. I don't see how I'm obligated to defend your cause, whatever it may be.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

That sounds great. I'm more inclined towards dinner though. I've been sitting around on airplanes all week. All I need right now is a nice, fresh meal.

I have the week off, so I'll leave the venue and time to the lady.

[Filter: Triton]

[inspiredvoice.insanejournal.com]

I think he likes you.

[mauvaisgarcon.insanejournal.com]

Your harsh words wound me, babe.
Though it's reassuring to know that I'm not the crazy one around here for once
Well, if you decide to take up my offer, let me know. If it helps, I have a few Greek costumes at home. I'd be glad to play along with whatever fantasies all of you seem to be having. Damn, must be a rush to believe you're some god

[roseredheart.insanejournal.com]

Um, thanks. Achilles won't like you flirting with me.

I'm sure that's true. And, oh, that must have been so exciting being in Asia! You're very lucky. But, here, well... I suggest looking up news stories from March 20th and 21st. It'll explain a lot.

[heraldofthedeep.insanejournal.com]

I doubt that.

This has nothing to do with religion. It has everything to do with power.

[inspiredvoice.insanejournal.com]

There are far more effective ways to wound than words. I'm partial to fire.

I think we can safely say that my answer is an emphatic "not in a million lifetimes".

[Filter]

[heraldofthedeep.insanejournal.com]

I don't give a rat's ass what the Winged Wonder thinks of me. He can be useful, or get the fuck out of the way.

[Filter]

[inspiredvoice.insanejournal.com]

That's good, because from the sound of things, he thinks you'd be good at giving head.